Though it was dusty and the smell was pungent but, it was me and I always. Those withered and tangled fingers holding the breath of my every second just poked me to end to do the gesture of releasing those from the struggle of that airy and smoky filled into the pores of filter and that dry leaves of that nicotine. I just ignored and wasted a small piece of wood by burning it, though even some paper was burnt too but, the worth was realized.
Slowly I walked and standing over that bridge which just had one-way traffic, I just looked down and merely could see as it was all smoky and I just questioned, what lies beneath?
The replies were the realization, though abundant and tough to judge but, I do not form prejudice, I take it usual (way of life). The acceptance was the factor of that shabby and grey truth which entered in that chilly winter December**. Then I just blow harder to look more beneath, it didn’t work, I jumped and just lost to find the truth, all I had to do was to just take in all the smoke and go beyond and beyond and I just did the same.
In the end though I was full of smoke and tried but, what I found lying underneath was courage wrapped in that small red box*. I opted it and the usual was defined. It just gave me courage to fight and withstand all those evil relations which form part of the materialistic world.
It gave me a vision, a vision to look beyond the selfless and for the self. The vision might be blurred but, it was as if I was happy and accepted it as just I chose it for myself, just for the part that would be unjust to me to quit it.
Many and more it was me. Standing tall above all and it was just I. someday I just felt that it might be a dependency and I may not be real, then I realized that at least I was in myself and all the way moving strong. It seemed better to hold a non-materialistic thing to produce a productive past which at least has the ability to define and move with the time. No one would be responsible ever till the time one would replace the non-materialistic with a natural part and it is the eternity of love, which would just instigate and counter the smoky self.
I will just wait for over and over. I may not be a fool at-least for the mirror which speaks of me. I have helped myself as I never opted to quit.
*the red box is the pack of cigarette.
**the month when i started smoking.
***this article is my reference to my idea of smoking.
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